Day 7

This day signifies a full week since I have broken up with my boyfriend.

Yesterday, I again, received a text from him.. as a reply to the last message I sent him. He told me that he still wants to come to Boston for school and that he, along with myself, really believes in it. Somehow, before I even pulled out my phone, I already knew it was a text from him. Isn't that funny? At that time, I was at Best Buy checking out e-readers that I was interested in purchasing. Suddenly receiving that text, my eyes could not help, but water up with tears. I feel like it was a sign from God telling me that he still has feelings for me...for him to even remember to respond to that text. Inside of me, I felt reassured that he has not given up his dreams and that he will come to Boston one day... though a long time away, we will reunite one day.

After I received that text, I really wanted to reply to him with something... ask him how he was doing... see if he has been okay... but I stopped myself. I told myself before that I had to mentally and emotionally prepare myself before I can even ask or tell him anything. That last Tuesday is supposed to be the last time we will contact for a few weeks.. until I know I am ready to speak to him again.

Now that I'm unable to support him and that he has to work in order to get the money he needs to provide for his daily needs... will he be able to study well and get into a college in Boston? I know he's not my responsibility anymore... that even if I was together with him... I didn't have to do what I did, but I felt compelled to BECAUSE I was his girlfriend. Now that we've separated, I can only support him from afar.

Even now, I still feel he has feelings for me.... I feel like he was most honest with me and really tried to open his locked door to me.

Oppa, please be good. I know it's painful to suddenly have an emotional and financial support taken away from you, but please be good. Don't try to find a re-bound and concentrate on your studies and work. If you want to come here for real, you have got to be disciplined and turn away from the things that will lead you away from your goals..... and even God.

I still pray for you every day... and I still pray that you will one day come to know God as I know Him.